A heat wave, an unexpected result, people on the streets – yes the World Cup is on, but make time in your schedule because Water Polo is coming home too!! This week’s match report is brought to you by Matt “Baddiel” Finch – it’ll bring a tear to your eye!!

June 26th Stats

A Narwhal on our Trunks (to the tune of some football song about Lions…)

We lost at home, we lost at home, the Narwhals, the Narwhals lost at home,
We lost at home, we lost at home, the Narwhals, the Narwhals lost at home,
We lost at home, we lost at home, the Narwhals, the Narwhals lost at home,
We lost at home, we lost at home, the Narwhals, the Narwhals lost at home.

Everyone seems to know the score (8-7), they’ve seen it all before
They just know, they’re so sure
Our defence is gonna throw it away, gonna blow it away
But we know we can play cos we can boast,

A Narwhal on our trunks
Our passing’s still appalling
11 strapping hunks
But massive problems scoring

So many shots, so many tears
But all those ‘oh so near’s
When your down and can’t find the gears
But I still see that tackle by John
And when Bedford scored, Finchy saving the ball
And Weeble wobbling

A Narwhal on our trunks
Our passing’s still appalling
11 strapping hunks
And Woody’s still not scoring

(The Narwhals have blown it, in the last minute of the game)
(The lights have failed, what now?)
(Bedford misses a sitter, didn’t miss the fluffer though)
(It’s a Father / Son / Shute tie for glory)
I know that was then, but could the Narwhals see glory again?

We lost at home, we lost at home, the Narwhals, the Narwhals lost at home
We lost at home, we lost at home, the Narwhals, the Narwhals lost at home
(Avondale have done it)
We lost at home, we lost at home, the Narwhals, the Narwhals lost at home

We lost at home, we lost at home, the Narwhals, the Narwhals lost at home
*REPEATED IN BACKGROUND*
A Narwhal on our trunks
Our passing’s still appalling
11 strapping hunks
But bigly problems scoring

A Narwhal on our trunks
Our passing’s still appalling
11 strapping hunks
But bigly problems scoring
A Narwhal on our trunks
Our passing’s still appalling
11 strapping hunks
But bigly problems scoring
*FADE TO END*

For those who didn’t get it – Fluffer went to Bedford for missing a sitter but he also got moment for doing something that I assume was ok. Man of the Match was shared this week by Finch Snr, Finch Jnr and Shute.

Due to the lack of majors in the game (despite our best efforts) we recorded 7 Maddy’s. That also includes Andy W’s match day disappearance. Stefan takes his first trip to Portugal and it was nice of the guys to keep him company.

Onwards to Wednesday and the visit of Eastern Otter. I wonder who can create our third football themed master piece?

Forza Narwhali!!

In the spirit of the World Cup, this week’s stats report follows a football theme. The entire update delivered in the medium of football chants. It will be almost like you are on the terraces… almost.

15th June Stats

(To the tune of “She’ll be coming round the mountain”) (Whey…)
We scored twenty-eight and they scored three,
We scored twenty-eight and they scored three,
We got twenty-eight goals,
We got twenty-eight goals,
We got twenty-eight and they got three.

(To the tune of “Blue is the Colour”) – a lovely 7 goal haul
Orange is the colour, scoring is his game. He just scored another, Bedford is name. (etc. etc.)

(To the tune of “Love will tear us apart”) – for his 6 goals – mostly counters.
Shuuute, Shute will tear you apart, again. (repeat)

(To the tune of “My old man’s a dustman”)
Matt Finch is a keeper, he wears a keepers hat,
But when he plays outfield, he says I’m having that,
He tries a dodgy bounce shot, sometimes it goes in,
Occasionally he’ll pass it, so well done to him…

Man of the Match: Charles K-T
(to the tune of “This old Man”)
Charles KT, he scored two,
M-O-M, congrats to you,
with a nick nack, paddy whack, winning was a doddle,
please try harder not to wobble

Almost a triple crown this week for Mr KT. A superb performance on the left wing – could have had more goals if he learnt how to push shot and catch. Who needs Rob Loveless?

Moment of the Match: Stefan Lombardo scoring on his debut…
(to the tune of “He’s one of our own”)
It came off the bar, It came off the baaaarrrr, He scored on the rebound, It came off the bar!!

Congrats to Stef for scoring his first goal for the club on his debut. Nice “assist” from Finch Snr – shame we aren’t counting those…

Fluffer: Charles K-T
(To the tune of “Blame it on the boogie”)
Don’t blame it on the bad pass, don’t blame on the stop clock, don’t blame it on Ed Gamble, blame it on your catching… He just can’t, he just can’t, he just can’t control the ball…

A well deserved and unanimous vote for Charles this week for his first fluffer of the year. Dangerously close to becoming the clubs second wobble master.

And to close, channelling the vibes of South Africa 2010: (to the tune of a vuvuzela…)

Baddoooooooooooppp!! Badddoooooooooooppppp!!

Until next time (to the tune of “Seven Nation Army”)
We’re the Narwhal Army!! We’re the Narwhal Army!!