7 days before Tour and it seems that our minds are already focused on the glorious fields of Hasslt rather than in the pool. Last Monday saw a disappointing 4th quarter capitulation against Avondale 2’s – where being 10-8 down in the 3rd we fell to a 17-10 defeat… Here are the stats:

19th Aug stats

The first quarter started well, finishing at 2-2 despite our inability to follow the game plan and front mark the pit. Rob and Phil provided the goals whilst Shute, Bowen and Gamble provide the majors. The 2nd quarter wasn’t too bad either, ending 6-5, but we were still struggling to employ our desired front mark tactic and slowly our defense began to break down. We were also let down by some wayward shooting and some suspicious refereeing that left us 5-2 up on exclusions at half-time.

We began to lose our way in the third. We conceded too many goals from counter attacks and we made far too many mistakes that allowed the game to get away from us. Despite Bedford picking up a brace and Shute finally scoring a one on one (I know I can’t talk) we found ourselves two down going into the 4th but the game still felt eminently winnable… then the 4th quarter happened…

We lost the 4th 7-2. We suddenly decided we didn’t want to defend or win the game and we did not help ourselves or each other to try and put things right. Loose shots, not watching for counters and not picking up players all contributed to a sloppy defeat. We need to stop having these 4th quarter melt-downs and try to stay focused for the full game… I’m sure we will be able to show our worth on Tour…

Man of the Match this week went to Dan “pit man” Bedford who also managed to pick up Moment of the Match for a glorious combination of a few of his goals. The highlight being his combination with Finchy for a route 1 goal, but also a superb goal where he linked up with Gary. It must also be mentioned that Finchy made a great save with his face which led to not one, but two stoppages in play!!

Fluffer this week was highly competitive and we have actually ended up with a 3-way tie (with 2 votes each). First we have Tadija “ball drop” Popovic for his shot/pass/drop that didn’t go very far. Second we have Gary “stay with your man” Bowen for too many swims that left an Avondale player free. Finally we have Rob “wayward” Loveless for too many shots that weren’t on target. That being said dishonourable mentions need to go to Ed “missing a 1:1” Gamble and Nick “please try and score more push-shots” Shute who both got one vote each. We also had a vote for “Everyone”… it was close – I nearly did it…

Still be investigated by the Portuguese police this week is Mr. Young, but he is also joined by Chris Mann and Luke Penfold for match day infringements. We are all disgusted by their behaviour…

As we approach Tour, it is important to start practising your lobs, headers and over-head kicks… not to mention your pinting techniques!!

Until next time – Forza Narwhali!!

It has been a few weeks since we have had a proper look at the stats chart and there have been two games where the Narhwals have been without their two key players – Messers Gimli and Grumpy – resulting in a loss and a draw. Now is a special opportunity to look at the stats in detail!!

August 9th Stats

On the goal front it is extremely interesting to see how the goals are spread around when Bedford is not in the pool. Most evidently, Andy “goal haul” Ogg grabbed 8 in 2 games whilst our top scorer was away. Those 8 goals lift Andy into the Green Zone with Phil “backsplash” Richards and Rob “3 majors” Loveless in hot pursuit. It is also tight a little further down – with Weeble, Tony, Punchy and Static separated by 2 goals.

Top striker Bedford is 23 goals off the century mark and with a goals per game ration of 3.67 is expected to break that boundary easily – especially as we power towards the Thameside League games in November and December. Compared to the same time last year, Nick “Von Poo” Shute is 8 goals down on his tally, despite having played 4 more games this year. Similarly Phil and Oggy are 8 and 3 goals down respectively. That being said, as a team we have scored 60 more goals this season having played 4 more games. Our goal difference so far for the season is +30, compared to last year’s -21.

In regards to majors, this is as ever a strongly “fought” competition, with John “Do you want some?” Holah leading the pack (as always) on 22 majors. Despite vocal threats at the Christmas Dinner from Mrs. Holah that he’d “be in trouble” if he brought the Catas Trophy home for a third year, it seems he hasn’t taken that message on board… He is closely followed by the usual suspects Ed “lazy major” Gamble (20) and Gary “Brutal” Bowen (19). This year’s surprise package is Nick “dirty cheat” Shute, following the leading pack with 17. This year we have committed 140 majors – with Finch Jnr holding the highest Brutality Rating of 3.00 – closely followed by Mr. Bowen on 2.71. Amazingly, Simon “clean as a whistle” Tidy has managed 10 games without committing a major… probably because he never covers back…

By far and away our best player this year (by Man of the Match) awards is Dan “Goals” Bedford (7) with Nick “Magic Moments” Shute leading the field with Moment of the Match nominations (8). The fluffiest fluffer at the moment is Matt “wayward” Finch (5), but he is closely followed by Tadija “jumping in” Popovic and Nick “not fair” Shute – both on 4. Currently on a leave of absence in Portugal are Messers Richards, Gamble and Mann (5,5,6) – hopefully they will be found soon…

There is still a long way to go in the season and plenty of time to rack-up some Fluffs, Maddys and Majors.

Forza Narwhali!!

Short and sweet this week due to the game being massively disappointing and it being Q2 reporting
season….
Despite numerous holiday absentees we were upbeat due to the absence of Ed ‘15% swim off win/loss
ratio’ Gamble. Needless to say we won all the swim offs and given we were three up with 4 mins
left of the game we should have won that as well.
The first quarter saw us take a strong lead despite attacking the very shallow end, Nick scoring a
glorious route one goal in the process. Our resident anaesthetist managed to get himself ejected
twice for getting overly physical but our man down defence held strong…. 2 – 1 at the end of the
first.
The second quarter saw more of the same with Oggy being utterly dominant in the pit and getting
either ejections or goals when we managed to pass him the ball and not throw it over his head :-/
Rob scored a very nice man up goal before getting himself red carded for giving the ref a funny look.
Literally. Still, wrapped up Fluffer nice and early. 4 – 2 at half time.
The third quarter saw us continue to dominate, both Oggy and Big Si scored the finest back shots
from the pit you will ever see . 7 – 5 going into the final quarter.
The last quarter was a shocker. We went 8 – 5 up before throwing it all away in a horrific final two
minutes. Chris Mann did score his first goal since Feb though! Final score 10 – 10.
Mom this week was Oggy who yet again thoroughly dominated the Kingston defence
Moment went to a very nice route one goal, pass from keeper to Nick’s hand on opposition 4m, first
time shot into top corner of shallow end goal.
Fluffer was Rob for somewhat unfairly getting himself wrapped in the second quarter.
Nobody went missing, everyone contributed. Mostly by getting themselves ejected though….

A formal stats report will come soon once Gamble sorts his life out and updates the tables…

Forza Narwali!